Let's talk about it anyway.
Its definitely gotten a lot better from before, I guess I'm not as unsure of myself as I was before. Well honestly now a lot of the public awkwardness still exists, though I like to play it up for some reason, (this house believes that the socially awkward do have their own appeal, if only in rom-coms, hopefully not) Still I have my weaknesses.
One very stupid thing I must confess to be insecure about is physical strength. As in, idk possibly it stems from that young age where boys are told they must be strong and all, not helped by the fact that I "got used" to being pretty strong in sec2, (ahh...those 100 push ups days) but the thing is I'm not anymore, and it freaks me out like crazy. It didn't help that I couldn't exercise my left hand for 2 months or so this year after I injured it, but I suppose its cause I wasn't exercising as much after I quit that dumb cca.
Long story short, if I see a muscular guy, I will edge away from him. If I see someone, especially a guy, half the time my mind is trying to judge whether I can beat him in a fight, whether I can outmuscle him.
Unhealthy, but better than before I guess....?
Labels: my weird opinion, myself