Stop it.

It's not your right to do it. I don't even have to tell you not to do it. Don't act chummy with me.

And you, what the hell. Stop patronizing me.

You know what, both of you. Stop bloody patronizing me.

When I say something I mean it, why can't you respect that. Especially after I've said it, time and time and time and again. What do I have to do? Hit you?

And it's not like you're very close to me are you?

Remember how we "became" friends? Remember how you treated me before?

Yeah. I remember, even if you don't.

And you, stop treating me like that. I don't know what you think of me all the time, but I know it isn't good. And that's what I don't like. Stop thinking that. Stop thinking oh its Ian going off again on another Ian rant. He's just being him. He's just like that.

No.

I'm not like that. I'm a person just like you and I thought I could trust you cause you know I expect you to not treat me like less than human.

Maybe I think differently from you, but surely that doesn't make me inferior. Or am I? To you?

Everytime you say something like, fine think that way.

Everytime you don't even bother to argue you imply that oh well, if you're so screwed up and want to think that way its not my problem. What the hell.

I'm not inferior. I'm not some retard who's impervious to logic and you know when I'm trying to be honest and say what I truly feel if its so unimportant to you I think to myself why heck I even bother.

Fine, since you're so superior then I guess you don't need me right. Fine.

Fine.

Just another starstruck (see above for evidence*) wanderer trying to find his way in this horribly confusing and sometimes messed up world.

This space as you might have realised is for my own venting. It's where I talk, to myself. To the universe. It's where I don't lie. Much. Chances are you won't get more truth out of me than these few billion pages of angst.

My life isn't that bad. Sometimes. The good parts just usually end up being the blank dates in between the posts you see. So yes, just to practice my math and to cheer myself up a little, the number of posts is inversely proportional to my mental wellbeing. Yes that counts as math with me.

And despite the wry smile on my face and the grin I can imagine on yours, I'm still rather sombre.

I promise you I'm sunny somedays. Stick around. You never know what you may learn.

*hint may or may not be in big black font at the top of the page.